i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
