There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
