And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
her vagine was all disorganized.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
