so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
