Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
