; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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