No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize