Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
This baby is an asshole
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
