fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
3pm strippers are depressing
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
