Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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