Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
