And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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