hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize