I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
