Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Randomize
