Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
There are leaves in my underwear?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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