Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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