Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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