Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
