i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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