Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
