It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
