he fucked my hip out of place.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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