She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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