Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?

(402): View more from Nebraska

4.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow

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(519): View more from Ontario

My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"

(1-519): View more from Ontario

I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"

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(702): View more from Nevada

She's never allowed to turn 21 again

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(503): View more from Oregon

no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.

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(312): View more from Illinois

I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird

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(505): View more from New Mexico

The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.

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(480): View more from Arizona

Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.

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