Kiss
Puke
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
