Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
