There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
