idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize