That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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