Swine flu. Run for my life!
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
