She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
