i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
