UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize