I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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