you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Boobs are out for the taking
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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