if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize