NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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