Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
