All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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