I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize