Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize