There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
What a dumb baby whore.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Randomize
