Your favorite bartender is back from prision
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
