I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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