I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
