The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
