All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
this boner is exhausting
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I will pee on everything he values.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
