2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize
