I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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