Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
